10 reasons New Zealand is better:
1) Our defense force is led by non-nuclear Hobbits, Orcs and Ents.
2) Everyone wants to COME here, but we are so far away that only a SELECT FEW ever get here.
3) Kiwi Ernest Rutherford was first to split the atom, but we are a non-nuclear country (see non-nuke Hobbits mention above).
4) NZ has no snakes or killer horror animals like crocodiles or actual Australians (who are all next door in Aussie).
5) Rugby is THE contact sport. It’s fast (matches are under two hours) and dangerous (rugby players eat their dead).
6) The Prime Minister appeared on Letterman to do the Top 10 and be mocked by Dave; no worries, mate.
7) Once scientists discover how to generate electricity with sheep, NZ will rule the world. (Note: NZ has 34 million sheep and 4 million people).
8) Kiwis do it different. Toilet water goes down the wrong way. You get lights to go off by flicking the switch on (up). And “fush’n’chups” (not sheep) is the nation’s favorite food.
9)NZ’s weekend begins 14 hours before New York City’s, which is good because…
10) NZ women are the most promiscuous in the world (2007), having an average of 20.4 sexual partners, compared to 16.8 for men.
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