Curmudgeons ‘R’ Us

I am pleased to announce that I have been elected President of Curmudgeons R Us. At least I would be pleased, except that club rules prohibit that. We are not allowed to be pleased, happy or giddy. And there is NO smiling. Unless beer is involved.

Thy Blog Be Done

  Many 12-step programs tell you to “Let Go and Let God”. But, as my big sister often reminds me, even when we do so, we frequently freak out and claw stuff right back. Case in point… I recently took a deep breath, said some prayers, and moved the HOGS Blog to a cheaper New Zealand […]

Questions That Haunt Me

  Are you supposed to send checks to people who retweet your Twitter tweets and ponies to the people who give you Facebook likes, or vice versa? I need to know soon, because the ponies out back are getting really loud. How can we have a SHRED of respect for so-called “Millenials” when they, overwhelming, […]

Hubba Hubba — The Eyes Have It

  You would not think a new pair of glasses would be that big a deal. But you would be wrong. I allowed the Chinese Fashionista Missus to choose my new specs, and she boldy went where I had never gone before. Big, round and tortoise. Comments on my Facebook page include: “Distinguished”. “Great look.” […]

Middle-age Spokes of Death

I tend to hang out with Chinese. Which explains a lot. But I do have one white, middle-age Kiwi mate, who is also married to an Asian. We occasionally get together to commiserate. By which I mean drink.

10 Reasons to Hate John Elway

OK, I don’t really HATE John Elway. But I would not LIKE John Elway if he had 20 pounds of bacon in each pocket, and not just because he hosed Mr. Tebow. But because: 1. He looks like he opened his mouth and somebody shoved in a grand piano. Backwards.