Archive for the Mid-50s Denny Crane Category


60 Ways To Know You’re Almost 60

    (Yes, I know there are formatting problems. I’m almost 60. I’m allowed.) You never pull anything out of your pocket without Panadol falling out You try to use the same *cup all day so that you don’t have to reach up into the cabinet and feel that hot-10-penny-nail-jabbing-into-your-shoulder-socket feeling You become the ultimate […]

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SPOILER ALERT — Top 10 Hogs Blogs from 2015

(Happy New Year from New Zealand! Here are our favorites from 2015, with the more serious ones at the bottom. Cheers.)   What a Good Man Looks Like — Bob Barry, Jr   The older you get, the more you understand how hard it is to find a “good man” in this life. The outpouring […]

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An Attitude of Gratitude at Christmas

  We are sitting here wearing our NHS 30th Anniversary t-shirt and our once-were-nice-until-we-got-yard-chemicals-on-them camo shorts, while drinking a $9 bottle of Heineken. This means that: we have totally down-tooled for Christmas; we are as per always waiting for the Missus at the mall; and we’r getting gouged by this flashy new restaurant. We have […]

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Get Mad at that Damn Deck!

I just realized that I paint the front deck like Russell Westbrook goes to the rim. Russ hates that damn rim. And I hate that damn deck. Russ and I have the very same DNA of RAGE. And when we tap into it, Missy, you best get out of the way.

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Mother Nature Always Wins, And There’s the Itch

This blog has mentioned before that men are creatures of action. Sure, we spend 99% of the time in our recliners. But that other 1%? When we are in the yard and armed with cutting devices? We are creatures of action. And once we get a head of steam? There. Is. No. Stopping. Us. We will cut and […]

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The Missus and Her Ducks

  The Missus was going to name her boy ducks Donald and Daffy, until I explained that high-priced Disney lawyers would cover her with so many writs she’d never be able to feed her ducks again. Hence she named them Dicky and Dashing Duck. Dicky’s wife’s is Dancy. This is because the Blog’s Missus likes […]

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‘FIGHTBALL: DYING OF SUCK’ — All the Funny in the Universe Smashed into One HILARIOUS Book

(Editor’s Note: Book giveaway completed! Thanks to everyone!)     Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Writers are supposed to write 1,000 words a day. Rain or shine. Summer and winter. In sickness and in health. Or something like that. But this blog has been on something of a hiatas hiatias hieties break of late, especially from funny. […]

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