Archive for the Parenting Category


We Were Lied To About Abortion. We Have to Stop

(A very serious one about abortion)   Oh little baby, you’ll never cry, nor will you hear a sweet lullabye.  Oh unborn child, if you only knew just what your momma was plannin’ to do. You’re still a-clingin’ to the tree of life, but soon you’ll be cut off before you get ripe. When I […]

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Hellooooo Grown Up Musician Son, Let’s Talk Retail

Don’t mind my 26-year-old musician son as he grumpily digs through the mall trash bin. He is not foraging for food, like many starving musicians. He is looking for the plastic packaging that he shredded about 30 minutes ago to get to his new headphones. Why? Because we have just had the following Father-Son chat […]

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Elmo and Cookie Monster in NZ; Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle in Houston; Which Was the Deadliest?

  My life passed before my eyes last week. I look around and all of a sudden realized that my normally laid-back New Zealand mall was jammed with people. Specifically, jammed with Moms, and Dads, and Grandmas, and LOTS of wide-eyed kids. Plus at least 10,000 strollers. As a highly trained observer, I quickly scanned the scene […]

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Junior Be Cruisin’ De World, Playing Dem Songs

    Junior emailed me this morning that he would go ashore in Ecuador and Skype us in the afternoon. Which was great, except that he didn’t say whether this would be HIS afternoon in Ecuador or OUR afternoon in New Zealand. As it turns out, it was both — his 6 p.m. and our […]

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The Big Lady With Purple Hair

Yesterday, I was shopping in our version of Walmart when I saw her. The first thing I noticed was her short, purple hair. Then the “circus tent” dress, her 350-pound bulk, and the painfully swollen feet that were somehow stuffed into brightly colored Crocs. I thought to myself, “I bet Mom would have loved this lady.”

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Happy Potamus Day, Son!

  Now THAT is the cover of the greatest ‘Happy 26th Birthday’ card ever! And BELOW are the inside pages to said card.     Because that’s how we roll in New Zealand. This is because, when we moved here two decades ago, birthday cards were boring, stupid and outrageously priced. That led to the […]

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That Moment When…

  Those Fatherly/Old Man/Okie moments when… … You are informed that there was really no need to buy the expensive microphone stand to replace the one Junior lost, because at his birthday party he is reminded by a friend that the missing mic stand has been at his house for months… … The sun is […]

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