Haven’t had so much fun since the hogs ate my sister? It must be true because it says that up above. Why then, have there been NO blog posts about hogs or pigs, readers have asked. And for these readers, today is for you.
1. You’d think kissing a hog would be all gross. Not always.
2. Everyone from Oklahoma has kissed a pig, which prompted Listerine to put this on their warning label: “Listerine kills germs that can cause bad breath (offer void in Oklahoma).
3. Kissing a pig? Yuck! That could never be sexy. Dumb city folks…
I kissed a pig and I liked it,
The taste of those hairy pig lips
I kissed a pig just to try it
I hope farmer Jim don’t mind it
5. Is this blog weightist; do you have something against full figure women? Absolutey not. We have the utmost respect for women who could squash us with one thigh tied behind their back.
6. Are German Shepherds the smartest dogs in the universe? Yes. And no. My childhood dog, Champ, knew about 100 verbal and hand commands. But when we went to a friend’s farm, Champ wanted to go eat up a 600-pound white hog, who was so big and mean that he had to be held in a cage welded out of drilling pipe. Dumb city dog.
8. Is Hollywood anti-pig? Why else would this epic film have to be made offshore?
9. Is it true that stardom can ruin a small town pig with a heart of gold? You be the judge.
10. Could you possibly end this blog post with a joke about a pig with a wooden leg? Why yes. Yes we can.
— Can Sarah Palin actually win the presidency? Absolutely, when….
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