OK, we admit it. I speak for all men in admitting that, as men of the male gender, we have done a few bad things.
War, mullets and making toe lakes while standing up and peeing come to mind.
Plus, 50 cent beer night, fart noises and golf.
OK, maybe add large-bore paintball guns, remote controls and really big breast implants.
We accept that women have grounds to feel some resentment toward men. Possibly even to retaliate a little.
In our atonement, we, as men, publicly testified that having a baby is the WORST PAIN IN THE UNIVERSE – way worse than banging your thumb with a ball peen hammer, or even taking a fastball in the goolies (well, it’s worse than the thumb banging thing, anyway).
So we’ve done our mea culpa. We’ve slept on the couch. We’ve eaten your Jenny Craig meals. (Lawsy lawsy lawsy).
But there is a point where female retribution against men must cease. Torture must stop.
And we simply cannot stand for it. Our ankles just won’t take it. Have mercy…
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